Be Your Own Valentine, Love Yourself First

To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance. – Oscar Wilde

Do you regard your own well being?

Do you compare yourself to the previous version of yourself?

Do you have confidence in your ideas?

Do you value your inner well-being equally as you value your outer looks?

Do you know how to avoid toxic people?

If your answer is YES for all the questions mentioned above, it means you are in self love.

If your answers have a few NOs …it’s OK! Think about this moment and describe your feelings and emotions of your current situation in your mind. If you are hurting, do not put blame on anyone, especially yourself, but try to work through the thoughts and feelings that came up for you at this time. Figure out a way to carry on with a new learning. And that could be done through Self Love!

Self love is one of the most powerful and important things a person can do in life. It has the power to change everything such as your relationships, your career, your health and a lot. Self-love means taking care of your own needs and not sacrificing your well-being to please others, in fact self love is cultivating a loving and healthy relationship with ourselves.

Well, now is the time to practice self-love. Be compassionate to yourself and show up for yourself. Use these steps to nurture your feelings:

It’s OK to not be OK – How many times have you pretended, that your life is going great? Life is not always great, it can be hard at times, but being authentic makes you real and natural. In order to show a false image of being fine we wear a mask of ‘I am fine.’ It’s a heavy burden to carry, so allow yourself to experience the freedom of being true and connect with people who can receive and understand your feelings.

Pause & Reflect With self reflection you gain a better understanding of your thoughts, feelings, strengths, weaknesses and your driving force. Self-reflection, if performed correctly and regularly, can enable you to make better decisions and can help you to lead a stress free life!

Unlearning & Relearning  Does it mean to forget everything that we know? No, it doesn’t mean that in fact, it means to adopt the new knowledge of today with a mind ready to accept it easily. One should unlearn by freeing their minds from stagnated ideas, norms, beliefs etc and be ready to learn with open mind in such a way that the task becomes convincing and interesting.

Daily Motivation– Besides doing other important things to nurture your; first and foremost thing is to take a daily dose of inspiration because motivation, by any ways is necessary to stay positive and contented. There are thousands of motivations around us. Such as motivation from books, quotes, seminars, objects, places, people, etc. We cannot identify all of these, but the motivational quotes are the best source of motivation that anyone can get easy access to.

Daily Routine- When we feel unorganised or unproductive, one EXTREMELY easy thing to do is to create a routine or schedule. It works as an anchor and brings a sense of control over our lives.

Be Kind to Yourself- Take a break. If you feel that you are having a stressful day due to any reason, just move away and do something different for few minutes, it relaxes you and refills enthusiasm in you!

Journal your thoughts & feelings- A journal can help you explore and sift through your feelings & experiences and learn from them. It’s a great way to get to know you, because it’s a positive self talk. It also identifies negative thoughts and helps in working on them through self reflection. Choose any medium to write, but the most important thing is to just get started. Here are some prompts to get started with:

  • Today I am feeling _________. I think this is because __________.
  • One big thing I have learned during this crisis is _________.
  • One thing that’s surprised me recently is _________.
  • What matters most to me in life is _________.
  • My ideal ideal day  _________.
  • My big dream is _________.

Laugh your stress out- Laughter releases helpful chemicals in our bloodstream – Endorphins (our natural “happy” drug) and Dopamine (part of our bodily “reward” system).     

  • Watch your favourite comedy shows
  • Netflix and similar have so many watching options, so find something that makes you laugh!
  • Practice laughter Yoga! Youtube has a great collection of laughter exercises!
Photo by Andrea Piacquadio on

Treat your body, mind & spirit with love so that you can treat others with the same feelings.

If you don’t love yourself, nobody will. Not only that, you won’t be good at loving anyone else. Loving starts with the self. -Wayne Dyer

Happy Valentine’s Day!

Disclaimer – This article is a personal view of the author.